Building Rapport is More than speaking of similarities

Recall your last memory of looking into the mirror. Maybe you were grooming yourself infront of the toilet mirror or brushing your teeth or even getting ready for a meeting in you room, or may be felt like taking a peek into that mirror “Oh I Look Good”

The Question is who do you see in the mirror?
That “Yourself” Of course! It how you perceive that reflection of yourself determines how you’ll act into following situations, in fact your reflection is studied to be the key element into how strong relationships you form with people you run into.

But the Question here is what does your reflection has to do with other people?
The idea is called Rapport, and it’s an extraordinary tool we sometimes consciously use and sometime unconsciously display and form connection, Rapport we build determines how we have been taken by other and how earnest we appear to others.

Rapport is created by the expression of commonality pretending to be similar to them, (in variety of social capacities, and in terms of knowledge, displaying similar emotions, similar pace to how they are talking, expression alike body language, and many more expressive gestures. When they feel same with you, they tend to feel more comfortable, when they are comfortable they enjoy themselves more ad when they enjoy themselves they appreciate your company and tend to share more of themselves with you.

We often create rapport by the words with people like, Hey, Where are you from? , what do you like etc, and exploring out those tangents which reveals the real similarity, but it’s often difficult to find those instant points where you base the lasting relationships, and however you’re aware that words are just 7% of the actual conversation where the rest 93% of the non-verbal sign and expressions is the Pandora box to master that often goes disregarded.
And now since this 93% of the Conversation is a major unconscious and which highly determine who we are and how we respond, and because we descend to those like us, or those who are what we aspire to be, a great way to create rapport is to match and mirror the people we run into.

If they speaking fast, you fasten your pace, if they’re speaking slow you make yourself slow with the pace, it allows you to be taken kindred minded and identical spirited person to them, use hand gestures as they do.
You can also mirror people’s way of touch and do it sensibly with people of opposite gender or elders, match the delicacy of their handshake.

Use your senses to instantly judge the boundaries of their comfort with using space effectively, don’t get too close if you sense discomfort. People many time use space effectively to create rapport for themselves keep that on a lighter note if someone’s trying to make that effort positively.

Breath mirroring is easy to do, and it eases comfort while creating a friendly connection in any situation.
You, facial expressions, your posture (sitting or standing), voice tonality, tempo, – the list goes on. Nod your head if you see your partner doing so.

Mirroring consciously will help them feel good with you and they’ll like you but can’t really explain why.
People in politics use these techniques to remain in the hearts of people, often time politicians express via being simple and consciously trying to be one of you to earn respect and admiration from the voters.

The surprising part, you did this for a long time during a conversation without having them sense it, will naturally have them mirroring you too, that’s called Pacing and Leading.

We unconsciously mirror those we feel connected to, but doing it consciously has the same power and accelerate conversations into lasting relationships, this not only leaves them with a lasting positive impression of you but the same impression of positivity and feeling of association for them too.

Mirroring is the way to improve our social interactions and they are also the source of reflection to where we seek power and strength.

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